So in the last post I promised I would write about Soren's sleep (or lack-thereof) and how it's been going. The first week of December when I started new employee orientation, Soren was an absolute champ. He slept from 9:30-6, just in time for me to get up and get ready to head to work. He didn't wake up once during that time, and he did it for 7 days. I really thought we had finally 'made it' to a time where I wouldn't be walking around daily with bags under my eyes and no-clue what I was doing for half the time. THEN we took four steps backwards. Soren would sleep from 9:30-2ish (4.5 hours), then was up every hour after that. Once he woke up I would bring him to our bed and nurse him like I had always done, but he would want to continue nursing for the remainder of the night it seemed. At his 6-month appt., his Ped. asked how he was sleeping. I told her I would rock him to sleep, and once he was asleep I would put him in his crib. Then shared how the rest of the night went. She said that some babies know how to put themselves to sleep, and others need to learn to do so with help. She said the problem was that I was waiting until he was fully asleep before putting him in his crib. She suggested I find a time between 6-12 months and completely 110% jump into a 'cry-it-out' sleep training method. I had never wanted to do this, and knew I could never listen to him cry for that long.
Last week, we hit a very bad wall. Soren was up at midnight, 2, 3,4,5,6, and 7. He did that for 3 nights straight. Prior to this I began to read "No cry sleep solution" and was wanting to start working on implementing some strategies at night. I went in when he woke, patted his back, "Shhhh'd" in his ear and said "night-night". If he started getting really upset, I would take him out, nurse him just to calm him down enough to the point that he was back asleep again, and then laid him back in his crib. It got him to go back to sleep, but then he was up every hour. At one point I made him cry it out, rubbing his back, picking him up to calm him down without nursing him, then laid him back down. Eventually he fell asleep but not without lots of tears on his and my part. He still woke up an hour later and there was no way I was going through that again. I brought him to our room and succumbed back to our nursing pattern in our bed.
This week I began by rocking him just a bit then laying him in bed at bedtime. A couple nights it was difficult, but *now* (fingers crossed) he can put himself to sleep at bedtime after our night routine. I even got him to do it without a pacifier! But the middle of the night stuff continues to be our downfall. We're also REALLY struggling with naps. He CANNOT sleep for more than 45 minutes at a nap. I go in there when I hear him really start to wake up, and he laughs and giggles. One main point of the book is that if babies don't get good, restful naps in during the day, they won't sleep well at night...and any nap under 1-hour doesn't really count because they don't get into a deep, restful sleep. So basically, his naps suck which means his nighttime sucks. I don't know how to get him to sleep longer, I don't know how to teach him to fall back asleep on his own. My head spins thinking about different routes to pursue and the pros and cons of all of them. I never really dove 100% into sleep training, foolish of me to start on a weekend when I was working. I think it's time to really make a plan and stick to it. I think it's great that I know he can put himself to sleep at night, we've been doing the same routine for many months now and I think that's why. But how do I keep him asleep? If anyone has any tips to share, please do, this momma is severely sleep-deprived!
I don't know if this will be helpful at all...Rylie has typically been a really good sleeper at night. What you were saying about if Soren doesn't sleep more than 45 min at a time during the day=bad night sleep, may not necessarily ring true for him. Rylie won't sleep more than 20 min at a time and may only do that a couple of times a day but sleeps through the night. She graduated from her bassinet to a crib on New Year's but lately has crying fits when I put her to bed at night. She's also been waking up briefly a few times per night. (Usually the pacifier is all it takes to get her to go back to sleep). I've been reading mom suggestions on babycenter.com in the sleep section, but haven't found anything that works. Good luck!
ReplyDelete-Britt P
I did the no cry sleep solutions stuff kind of half-heartedly but it worked a little better for my son. One thing that I was super against at first was bottles at night because I was all about breast feeding. I saw the light after my mom watched him one evening and had to give him a formula bottle before bed... He slept soooo well I couldn't believe it. Formula bottles fill them up better and it really won't hurt the baby at all to have one or two a day. It is probably better for him to have a happy and well rested mommy and a bottle once a day than a tired one. I'm not saying do it or not. It was really difficult for me to choose to give my son a bottle. I means really difficult, but for us it was what worked. Good luck and I hope you find a good solution that works for you! It's not easy when they're little but it gets easier. They also go in patterns. Maybe he's going through a growth spurt and just feels extra hungry. He might get better in a few weeks too. Make a plan though and stick to it. Good luck with that handsome little guy! Boys a a lovely handful! - Nicole Gravelle
ReplyDeleteHang in there, Mindy. It seems tough now, but before you know it, he'll be all grown up, and you'll wish you could have those nighttime bonding moments back. I promise, he will eventually sleep through the night, no matter what method you choose.
ReplyDeleteOh Mindy, I wish I had an answer for you!! I feel for you! Sleep is just so good for a person and running on empty is so very hard to do, yet what can you do?! I honestly don't why in the world Soren would be waking up every hour of the night! Seriously! Maybe I told you this already (?) but I tried that No Cry sleep book too and tried EVERYTHING suggested, from changing the temp of the room to the fabric of his jammies and did the whole shhh thing, and I remember many 'a night laying on his nursery floor with arm hanging through the rails patting his back or something, but none of that worked. Crying it out was the only thing that worked, which i know you don't want to do. It only took 3 days though and it was DONE. He slept through the night after that. That was Eli. What I would try with Soren, not sure how much you're already doing... I would do bath, stories, and all that jazz. Then rock him for like 5 minutes or so til he's relaxed but not sleeping. Then lay him in bed. Say shh, ni-night and whatnot, then leave. What saved Carter was a lovie blanket bear. Once I started giving him something like that, and eventually a full blankie in replacement, he could put himself to sleep and stayed asleep. I'd make sure Soren's room was nice and cozy warm and that there was a steady sound of something in his room, whether it's a sound machine or a humidifier. In the night, give him some time to TRY to put himself back to sleep before going in. If he's super worked up, then go to him. What finally got Hannah to sleep through the night at 10 months old, was for DADDY to get her. She nursed exclusively and would NOT ever take anything else. So as soon as I would get her in the night, she'd want to nurse even though she did NOT need that feeding. So for a few weeks, Kevin would get her in the night, rock her to sleep, and put her back. That broke the feeding cycle and then one waking at a time she just didn't wake any more, and by the next month she was completely sleeping through the night. As for naps, try not to stress. I remember going through those 45-minute nap deals with one of the kids. And I also remember reading that that's when their body changes sleep cycles or something like that. 45-minute intruder or something? But knowing that did no good in fixing it. I think it just outgrew itself. Just know that if he naps short like that, he might need to go to next nap earlier and maybe add a nap in the day. Don't feel you have to go to him as SOON as he wakes up. Let him play and get the lil' break YOU need. It's good for him to entertain himself sometimes. =) Hope things get settled out SOOOON for you!!! Hang in there, mama!! You're doing great!!
ReplyDeleteHonestly, Lauren still gets up through the night...sometimes multiple times. We tried a little bedtime boot camp during our Christmas break and it worked but only because I think she is old enough to understand what we are telling her and that we are out in the other room. No tears either! I have to agree with my sister on this one...one day you will miss it. I reached my breaking point with being too exhausted with baby 2 and working full time. Your body will soon adjust to working on little sleep :)
ReplyDeleteMindy- I have too much to say to post, except that this was the most challenging part of parenting for me (and sometimes still is). I would be happy to chat with you sometime if you want, or just send an email or something if that is easier for you. Let me know- in a nutshell- Do what works for you and Soren. If it is getting to the point that you need something to change (which it sounds like it may be) then try some techniques. But, if what you are doing is working, then don't worry too much about what other people think or say. My informal polling (extremely informal) would say that most babies do not sleep through the night consistently for quite some time- so don't beat yourself up about it- You are doing great!
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